Our Family Beginnings

I had lunch with a friend yesterday, and he and I both agree that we are leading very dull lives at the moment.  That’s actually not a bad thing.  He’s totally my brother from another mother, and so excitement isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be.

We haven’t heard any more on the adoption front.  On most days, I’m fine with it.  I suspect though, as the holidays have been getting closer and closer, it’s bugging me more and more.  It’s not even just the holidays, as the holidays also blend seamlessly with my birthday.

I’m a birthday person, kinda.  I want it to be this big deal, but at the same time I feel unworthy when I am the center of attention.  It’s far more comfortable to whine about wishing I was the center of attention than it is for me to be the center of attention.  I never said I wasn’t a weirdo.

Anyhow, Mr. Badger asked what I wanted to do for my bday this year (which happens to be on Thanksgiving), and I said “Nothing.”  He luckily is fluent in Lindsay speak and knows that I am full of shit on that one.  I said to him that it isn’t about being older, I don’t mind that at all.  It is, however, another year.  Another. Year.  That drives me up a wall.  Another year of “this will be our year”.  And yes, I get that this year, in all likelihood will in fact be our year, but still…

So I’m pretty boring right now.  Nothing going on at work.  Nothing really going on in the family.  It all just is.  I haven’t had much to say, which sucks, because today?  I’d rant and rave about waiting.  But I don’t want to leave you with the impression that it gets to me on a daily basis.  Just today for some reason.

There’s only one thing I really want for my birthday.  If I wish really hard, do you think I’ll get it?

Thanks to Jendeis!

The Rules:
A.) Go to Music Outfitters.
B.) Enter the year you graduated from high school in the search function and get the list of 100 most popular songs of that year.
C.) Bold the songs you like, strike through the ones you REALLY hate.

1. The Sign, Ace Of Base
2. I Swear, All-4-One
3. I’ll Make Love To You, Boyz II Men
4. The Power Of Love, Celine Dion
5. Hero, Mariah Carey
6. Stay (I Missed You), Lisa Loeb and Nine Stories
7. Breathe Again, Toni Braxton
8. All For Love, Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting
9. All That She Wants, Ace Of Base
10. Don’t Turn Around, Ace Of Base
11. Bump N’ Grind, R. Kelly
12. Again, Janet Jackson
13. I’ll Remember, Madonna
14. Whatta Man, Salt-N-Pepa
15. Wild Night, John Mellencamp and Me’shell Ndegeocello
16. Without You/Never Forget You, Mariah Carey
17. You Mean The World To Me, Toni Braxton
18. Can You Feel The Love Tonight, Elton John
19. The Most Beautiful Girl In The World, Prince Symbol
20. Fantastic Voyage, Coolio
21. Baby I Love Your Way, Big Mountain
22. Regulate, Warren G and Nate Dogg
23. If You Go, Jon Secada
24. Back and Forth, Aaliyah
25. Now And Forever, Richard Marx
26. When Can I See You, Babyface
27. Please Forgive Me, Bryan Adams
28. So Much In Love, All-4-One
29. Shoop, Salt-N-Pepa
30. Any Time, Any Place/And On And On, Janet Jackson
31. Shine, Collective Soul
32. Said I Loved You…But I Lied, Michael Bolton
33. Return To Innocence, Enigma
34. All I Wanna Do, Sheryl Crow
35. Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm, Crash Test Dummies
36. Can We Talk, Tevin Campbell  Note:  He grew up in my hometown, I think maybe my brother’s year?
37. Funkdafied, Da Brat
38. I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That), Meat Loaf
39. Gangsta Lean, Drs
40. Because The Night, 10,000 Maniacs
41. Cantaloop, US3
42. Whoomp! (There It Is), Tag Team
43. Come To My Window, Melissa Etheridge
44. Stroke You Up, Changing Faces
45. I’m Ready, Tevin Campbell
46. 100% Pure Love, Crystal Waters
47. Anytime You Need A Friend, Mariah Carey
48. Because Of Love, Janet Jackson
49. Linger, Cranberries
50. Loser, Beck
51. Found Out About You, Gin Blossoms
52. Gin And Juice, Snoop Doggy Dogg
53. Never Lie, Immature
54. Streets Of Philadelphia, Bruce Springsteen
55. Getto Jam, Domino
56. Endless Love, Luther Vandross and Mariah Carey
57. I Miss You w/ Aaron Hall
58. Understanding, Xscape
59. This D.J., Warren G
60. Cry For You, Jodeci
61. Keep Ya Head Up, 2Pac
62. Who Am I (What’s My Name?), Snoop Doggy Dogg
63. Another Night, Real McCoy
64. Your Body’s Callin’, R. Kelly
65. Tootsee Roll, 69 Boyz
66. I Can See Clearly Now, Jimmy Cliff
67. Never Keeping Secrets, Babyface
68. Crazy, Aerosmith
69. Just Kickin’ It, Xscape
70. At Your Best (You Are Love), Aaliyah
71. Rock And Roll Dreams Come Through, Meat Loaf
72 Amazing, Aerosmith
73. Always, Erasure
74. Groove Thang, Zhane
75. Dreams, Gabrielle
76. Mr. Vain, Culture Beat
77. Mary Jane’s Last Dance, Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers
78. Anything, SWV
79. Beautiful In My Eyes, Joshua Kadison
80. Stay, Eternal
81. Flava In Ya Ear, Craig Mack
82. U.N.I.T.Y., Queen Latifah
83. Prayer For The Dying, Seal
84. Secret, Madonna
85. Here Comes The Hotstepper, Ini Kamoze
86. Everyday, Phil Collins
87. Don’t Take The Girl, Tim McGraw
88. Got Me Waiting, Heavy D and The Boyz
89. December 1963 (Oh, What A Night), Four Seasons
90. Indian Outlaw, Tim McGraw
91. Always, Bon Jovi
92. I’m The Only One, Melissa Etheridge
93. Back In The Day, Ahmad
94. Love Sneakin’ Up On You, Bonnie Raitt
95. I’ll Take You There, General Public
96. Always In My Heart, Tevin Campbell
97. What Is Love, Haddaway
98. And Our Feelings, Babyface
99. Bop Gun (One Nation), Ice Cube
100. I Wanna Be Down, Brandy

I can’t very well leave you all hanging can I?

We slept on everything, including some additional information about the birthfamily.  In the end, there were too many pieces of this puzzle that we were not comfortable with - including a closed adoption.  We’d know who they are, and they’d know who we are, but they wanted no contact with the child…ever.

It is hard to say no when an opportunity is presented, but you know what?  This child is meant to be someone else’s.  Just as we wouldn’t want someone else to take our child, we don’t want to stand in the way of the right match for this family.

Our time will come.

I finally got my lazy ass to the doctor, and as a precursor, I’m fine.

You see, when I stand up, I get woozy.  This symptom is super pronounced when I am working out, causing my trainer to just make sure I was fine.

In the end it was like this old joke:

A man goes to a doctor’s office. He says, “Doctor, it hurts when I raise my arm over my head.”

The doctor replies, “Then don’t raise your arm over your head.”

Basically, I have borderline low but normal blood pressure and iron.  So after taking me very seriously and finding nothing wrong, the doctor says “stand up slower”.  I was amused.  I love my regular doc.  He did say that if it gets worse, to come back, but it’s likely exactly what one would expect given my makeup.  Sludgy blood strikes again.

In an interesting turn, we heard from our agency again.  There is a birthmother/father that they are working with that has a baby due in 2 weeks.  The birthmother is white and the birthfather is 1/2 black and 1/2 hawaiian.  My friend remarked “it’s a baby Obama!”.  This is outside of our preferences, and I know Mr. Badger is a little more gunshy in this respect.  So we’re gonna talk about it this weekend.

Please watch these roasts, it’s SO worth it:

So today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss awareness day.  I assume it must have been somewhere in my subconscious last night as I dreamt of, guess what, having a miscarriage.  I’ve never had that dream before, and it definitely rattled me this morning to the point where I couldn’t even tell Mr. Badger about it this morning.  It wasn’t anything super concrete.  I was on a road trip and went to the loo, and went to wipe and there was just tons of blood.

If I had not had an early loss, I’d be writing a post today with a 10 month old on my lap.  That blows my mind a bit.  It’s just proof that life continues along, and at some point I will have a 10 month old on my lap.

On that front, no news.  It’ll just be no news until there’s news, I suppose, and I’m mostly okay with that.  I talked to my therapist about the wait and it helped.  I basically said that by NEXT holiday time, we’ll in all likelihood have a baby, so anything before that is icing but not to expect anything before that.   It helps fend off the “when will it happen” anxiety.

For today, though, I will remember that I was once pregnant, if only for a day, and nothing can take that away from me.

Ah Meredith - quitting therapy because you feel happy!  I have been down that road, and you should listen to the good Dr. Wyatt, because you are SO not done.

Here Comes the Flood

It’s not only the title of the episode, but also one of my favorite Peter Gabriel songs.  On a topline level, I have almost no complaints of substance.  I found the flood to be stupid and gimmicky, but you know what?  I’m gonna go all poetic and chalk it up to literally washing away two seasons’ worth of bad writing.  At least they are not pimping some catastrophe as The! Worst! Most! Amazing! Twist! EVAHR! this week, so I’m sticking with my poetry.  I also want more Meredith/Derek time, but then again, what I got, as I will discuss below, I am happy with.  Baby steps, Shonda.  This couple needs to be around for the long haul.   I just want some heat damnit.  Is that too much to ask? At least this week’s promo is pimping Derek in his birthday suit, so I’ll quit my bitching on that front.  Also - how much did I love Mer/Cris/Alex/Lexie/George at lunchtime?  SO MUCH.

Around the horn

Chief - Chief’s determined to shake things up.  I did really like how they showed Chief’s rules interspersed with the rounds on the patients.  It was visually a nice way to start off the episode.  Too bad the Chief’s being a total jackass.  The way they are writing him so far makes one wonder how he ever got to be chief of surgery.  How would he survive if Bailey weren’t there to save his ass every week?

The Frathouse storyline - “What would you prefer Meredith?  Chocolate Cake or an STD?” Derek has a point.  They are adults and I can’t imagine that when he was asked to move in that he expected it to be anything except just the two of them.  However, Meredith totally has a right here as well.    They are her family, and she wouldn’t kick out his sisters if they were living in New York.  It’s about how you handle it, Derek.  Ambushing her and making assumptions were wrong, and he accepted that at the end of the episode.

Lexie/Sloan - “Use fewer words, Grey.”  She rambles like Meredith, plus she’s “Lexipedia”.  Her photographic memory stuff was some of my favorite parts of this episode (”Periodic table, GO!”).  I love that he treats her like any other intern.  He told Karev to suck it in S3 when he ditched a plastics case to stick with Addison for a patient, and did the same with Lexie.  But because he is the best friend of her half-sister, he still treats her like a kid sister, and calls her pathetic in a very adorable way that even she knows is all in fun.  Too cute.

Mer/Cristina - Really Meredith’s whining last week was less about Meredith and more about Cristina.  Basically, Cristina has her own issues that she is not willing nor ready to own up to.  I am happy to watch these two move past their way pathological co-dependency.  I love that Cris cares enough about Meredith to go to Wyatt because she thinks Meredith is not ready to leave therapy yet, but the tables are turned and Wyatt aptly says that this is about Cris’ pain and sadness.

Cristina - Her patient lives life at an 8 in pain.  He couldn’t feel the pain of his wife’s death because of his all consuming pain in his nose.  Cristina is totally a woman living in pain and avoidance, moreseo than even Meredith.  Her patient’s story broke my heart, but I found it interesting that in the face of his pain, her response is “I’ll draw your blood”.  Feelings have always been too intense for Cristina, she’s a bottler.  She’s also devastatingly selfish.  Izzie finds this great apartment, and Cris assumes that it was for her and Callie, and she totally screws Izzie over.

Izzie - She’s alone and wonders why.  Maybe because since Denny, you walk around all self-righteous and judging everyone around you.  Just a thought.  Glad she’s getting over it a bit, and I loved her flipping out on Cris and Callie.

Mer/Shelly (cancer patient) - Meredith goes from whining to realizing that life is too short to not talkabout the important things, as we see through her patient’s eyes.  The patient wants nothing more than to avoid discussing her cancer, since it’s all everyone else talks about.  But because of that, Shelly isn’t talking about her cancer with the one person she should be speaking with - her Doctor.  Plus, the comment about the hair making her happy - I totally agree Shelly, the hair makes all of us happy too.

Derek/Cristina - She’s hated him for a long time now, and on one hand, if my best friends on/off boyfriend treated her like Derek has treated Meredith, I’d hate him too.  However, I found it wonderful that they finally got to the crux of this issue.  She’s jealous of losing Meredith to Derek.  It was hilarious that Derek knew exactly how to play Cristina to get her on his side, but also mad props to Cris for calling him on it.  “We are not Team Meredith.”  I hope we see more of this, because it’s helping to bring Meredith and Derek closer in the end.

Izzie/Alex - I hate to admit it, but I actually like Izzie this season.  She’s back to that usually optimistic gal who when pushed, will go all trailer park on your ass.  She still wants to live with Alex “if you can get over yourself”, but he’d rather “live in my honest to God car”.  She believes in the good in people, and so she’s not ready to give up on Alex.  That shit is SO on.

Mark/Derek - I love that even though Derek undercuts him, joking that “he’s in pain…I don’t think he needs a tummy tuck” that Mark doesn’t let it phase him, and then Derek takes it like a champ, complimenting Lexie for the find.  Those Grey women certainly make their men better doctors, don’t they?

George - Let him take the damned test already.  We know he’s gonna pass, so are we done now?  Granted, it means less time for him to sleep with women out of his league, so that’s fine with me.

Bailey - “This is me teaching with enthusiasm.” She was underused as the foil for the chief, but with a cast of thousands, I suppose there wasn’t much room for her this week.

Alex and his whiny patient - As Grey’s often does, it uses the patients as mirrors into the lives of the doctors.  The patient has had a shit life, much like Alex, but maybe, just maybe, it’s turning around.  I found it very adorable that the patient decided to say hello to the girl at the store, which leads to Alex saying “Hello” to Izzie at the end of the episode.  It was just a simple utterance, but was delivered impecably. Alex is the type of guy to say “hi” not “hello”, but maybe Alex’s luck is turning around too.

Mark/Callie/Hahn - I just love Callie confiding in Mark, and him being an ass about it.  “Do I need to give you a spanking?”  I found it hilarious, but that’s mostly credit to Eric Dane’s great sense of comic timing.  Granted, I’d want to kill him too if I were Erica.

Mer/Der - Way to have a backbone, girlfriend!  I love that she finally gave him a piece of her mind about how he manipulated Cristina and attempted to steamroll Alex and Izzie.  This McDreamy, the one at the end who said “Okay, but I want to talk about it again when you’re ready” - that’s what I tune in for.  Where has Shonda been hiding him?  Also - mark my words.  In this episode, Meredith asks if Derek still loves her, despite her being honest, and he assures her he does.  Meredith has not yet said I love you to him, not since “pick me, choose me, love me”.  I so bet that it’s coming, but it’ll be a sweeps episode.  And for the love of God - three episodes in (the first one counts as two) and all we get is a peck on the cheek?  Dude.  Ellen and Patrick totally slip each other the tongue in most of their kisses (the S4 finale was a glaring case where they did not) - so can we please have that back?  Kthxbai.

Wrapup

I love that Wyatt said that the point of therapy is not to be happy, but rather to be able to feel in spite of the horribleness in the world and know that those feelings won’t kill you.  I can’t have summed it up better than that.

Also, the cast is BLOATED. Like OHSS levels of bloat.  We don’t get into any storyline in 42 minutes with a cast as large as this.  I know I keep saying that, but I think as evidenced tonight, it bears repeating.

I could sleep all day today -
The wedding has come and gone and my brain hasn’t kicked in yet.  I owe you all a grey’s review, but in the meantime, check out the wedding pix.

http://picasaweb.google.com/ljauss/amyswedding#

In the land of bullshit, this ranks up there with total bullshit.  30 days this time.  AF has arrived.

Truly, I only mention it because I am astounded.  I got my first period at age 12.  Now, 22 years later I have regular cycles?  Seriously?  I guess I just like keeping track.  Maybe I’ll code it in red on my google calendar.  It’s just something I’m not used to, even after 4 cycles.

Not that I didn’t see it coming, I’ve been breaking out for a week, was super crabby on Sunday.  Yep, that’s a sure sign.  Freaky.

Oh, and L’shana tovah to all my fellow MoT out there.  I am celebrating by going to see Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist in a sneak preview tonight.  I will eat an apple.

By Courtney’s request, my review of last night’s Grey’s Anatomy.  I get it, I’m a total squeeing fangirl, and I’ll like most of what is put in front of me so long as I have my happy Mer/Der, but I’ll try to give a good evaluation.

First off, I need to get this timeline thing off my chest.  There’s an entire thread devoted to timeline issues on Television Without Pity, but it was WAY ridiculous last night, so befuddling actually that I assume Shonda wrote it just to fuck with people who whine about the timeline.  I’m whining anyway.  If the show started in 2005 on the interns’ first day, we’ll go with that.

Julyish 05 - First day

Julyish 06 - first day of s4

October 06 - “Haunt You Everyday” - the halloween episode

at most Mid-November 06 - Derekand Meredith break up

6 weeks later - Mer’s in therapy and bearguy comes in, clinical trial patients are gathered

One month later (January?) - Bearattack guy’s surgery, Also when Greta goes on her cruise with her possibly fictional/tumor induced boyfriend

5 months later (May 07) - Greta’s surgery.  Also - before this, we see Addison and Callie eating lunch outside the hospital and there are leaves on trees and short sleeves abound.  Interesting because Derek has a winter scarf on in the elevator, and everyone else is also dressed for the cold.

Maybe another month of the clinical trial, just to be totally fast - Mer/Der reunite, but Chief’s got a coat in his arm, and Meredith goes to Derek’s trailer and needs a sweater.

So now tell me this.  How the fuck is it FALL in Seattle with SNOW, and it seems to be Fall ‘06 again, specifically midway through their second year.  Disbelief, I’m suspending it.  Fine.

Shonda’s so meta!

Tonight’s episode was a huge conversation with Shonda to the fans and critics.  Even in her blog today, she said that every word written had a meaning for the season.  Until ratings change your mind, right Shonda?

Seattle Grace/Grey’s Anatomy has gone from the #1 program to #12 in rankings/nielsens.  Chief/Shonda says that everyone’s on notice because the doctors/writers have gotten lazy.  That they were once this unknown and then got huge and rested on their laurels, but that it was changing.  They are going back to basics.  Basically, this was a slate-wiping episode for Shonda and Co. to highlight where they screwed up and send it off into the light, like Denny.

One choice meta-moment though was Alex ignoring Izzie.  He was hoping she’d get annoyed by the sound of her own voice and shut up.  You hear that Heigl?  That was the writers getting you back a little.

Dream a Little Dream of Me

That was the title of the episode and there were three dreams that occurred.

Dream 1 - Meredith has a recurring nightmare where she waits for Derek in the house of candles, except he’s hit by a bus and dies.  Got it.  Shonda said at the end of last season, and was just doing a big fake out like Rose does to Derek does to Meredith throughout the episode.  She loves him, she’s scared to lose him.

Dream 2 - Cris wipes out on the ice and dreams of her and Mer in their elderly years in Meredith’s house where Cristina has to still do everything for her.  I just find it annoying that Mer of S1/2 never needed anyone to do things for her, and clearly Cristina has a fear of winding up in a platonic life partnership with Meredith.

Dream 3 - Izzie sees Alex making out with some one night stand, as he looks her right in the eye.  She momentarily flashes back to riding the elevator in season 2 in her prom dress, except when the doors open, Denny is there, and they walk off into the light together.

Clearly all three dreams are things that are not going to happen.  Can Denny PLEASE stay dead now?  I love Jeffrey Dean Morgan, I do, but truly, Shonda should have thought about that before killing his hot ass off.

Let’s go around the horn with the cast

Izzie - Why does she get so bent out of shape for Meredith saying to Alex that he is a good guy.  Whatever.  At least she wasn’t much in the episode and she also thinks Derek is a good guy.  We’ll see how good she thinks he is on 10/2 when Derek wants Alex and Izzie to move out.  She was fine, and mostly out of the way, where she should remain.

Chief - He went soft because MEREDITH is in the program?  That’s like McCain trying to get out of the debate to work on the economy.  Chief never seems to think things through and when he gets nervous, he goes by the seat of his pants.  Glad Derek called him on it.  I did like the speech at the end though, even if it was, and maybe because it was Shonda speaking through him, admitting they’ve all been lazy.

George - Was George even in the episode?  I’m fine actually with the role he played.  Boy gets too much tail and screentime as it was, and he was a non-event this week.

Bailey - Kinda like George, she just wasn’t around very much.

Rose - They didn’t need her to go all bunny-boiler, but whatever.  Bitch is gone.

Alex - I get it, and as I discussed with Bleu, he’s much like a male version of Meredith.  One step forward, two steps back.  He tries to hide it, but he really is a good guy.  Much like trying to find a way to save bartender Joe’s life, he does it again with the insurance issue along side Bailey for his patient.  And as much as cheating is despicable, I do like the speech he gave about why men cheat.  It was heartfelt and makes me eager to watch him grow up this season.

Callica (Callie/Erica) - OH I GET IT!  Callie was experimenting in the OR and in the bedroom with Hahn!  How clever!  I will admit that it wasn’t done up like Gizzie from last year, as I was fearing it would.  I’m also heterosexual and am in no position to take offense to the fact that two adult women falling in love with each other with no other interest in women may cause.  I’m reserving judgment on this ’ship until it is developed further.  Hate Callie’s hair straight.  Love Hahn’s curly.  Also on Hahn, loved her clinical approach to learning how to teach - and in the end she just figured out a way when the pressure was on for Callie.  Cliche, but I can deal.

Mark/Lexie - Adorable.  “You’re my half sister’s best friend, so…” “You thought that means that we’re friends?”.  He took on the role of big brother, and sassed her lots.  I loved every minute of their childish teasing.  It was very sweet.

Lexie - Please tell me that Lexie is gonna learn from George’s mistake and NOT pursue him just because she wants him (like he admits to doing with Meredith).  I’ve really come to love Lexie Grey.  Chyler is really playing her in a fun manner with great comic awkwardness (like when she was reading the letter from the husband to the wife).

Cristina/Owen - Hot.  Hot hot hot.  Cristina has always scoped out her men in advance, like CardioGod dude and Burke.  This guy is a surprise to her and challenges her thinking, and she admits to her own mistakes in front of him.  It’s a new side of Cristina that I knew was there, and was happy to see.  I’m glad we’ll be seeing more of it this season.

Meredith/Cristina - Again, I have professed my undying love for Meredith.  Tonight they wrote her over the top, and I hope it was just to make a point.  If Meredith were my friend, I’d want her to shit or get off the pot too, as much as it pains me to say.  Though I agree with Meredith that Cris’ slipping on the ice was kinda karma.  My thought, last season Cristina outright told Derek that she didn’t like him, this is how that gets resolved so that she can be supportive moving forward.  I look forward to a return to S2 when Burke is bossing around Derek and Cris says to Meredith, “Mine’s bigger thank youuuuurs” with Derek and Hunt.

Derek/Mark - Best Bromance EVER.  The two of them could just trade barbs all day and I’d be content to watch.  I will relay my favorite scene of the night:

Mark:  What happened to your hand?
Derek: Scalpel…Rose…Not intentional.
Mark: She’s a dead mouse on the kitchen floor, at some point you gotta pick it up and throw it away.
Derek: Mmm.
Mark: Want me to take a look at that?
Derek: Mer’s gonna take care of it. (my note - SQUEEEE)
Mark: I’m a renowned plastic surgeon.
Derek: It’s just a scratch.
Mark: She’s a resident.
Derek (very I know where my bread is buttered look on his face): She gives me sex…especially when I’m wounded (snickers).

Also loved Mark’s line with the Chief.

Chief: Sloan - take Grey.
Mark: The good Grey?
Chief (attitude): The intern Grey.

Mer/Der - they weren’t on screen much, but what there was made me all happy and gooey and full of warm feelings.  They were playful and sweet and he’s not pushing, but she’s not freaking on him when he makes a joke about getting married.  Granted I thought him trying that joke on Meredith to point out what Rose had done was a bit crass to me, but Meredith was playful about it, so I’ll deal.  Also, when the Chief took out all his rage on Meredith, Derek finally yelled “RICHARD” to get him to stop, and protect/stand up for Meredith.  Finally, finally, finally.  I also love that Meredith indicated she was still seeing Dr. Wyatt, who I believe is back next episode.
Overall a decent episode - I liked it.  Not too much time spent in any one place, though I could always use more Mer/Der on the screen.  Okay Shonda, you are starting over? I’m giving you some long rope.  Try not to hang yourself again.

eta:  Meta means self-referential.  See urban dictionary.