Our Family Beginnings

Our homestudy is officially approved!  Definitely good news, but not the news I’m REALLY looking for today.

This is gonna be a while.  There is some legal wrangling going on with this beautiful little girl.  We’ve seen her picture, and she is gorgeous.  Born about 6 weeks ago, and I can’t really go into more of her situation right now.  I can say that the birthfamily and baby and agencies have all done the right thing, and we are hoping that the states involved pick up the pace and get this little girl out of this legal gray area.

That could take a few weeks, but our local agency is working with the placement agency to rush the homestudy if needed.

We are one of three couples being considered.

We have no idea when the birth parents will make a choice.

We have no idea how long this limbo will last.

We do know that if not this little girl, then clearly soon, and our agency is actively considering us, which feels great.

I am walking a fine line between elation and a clear defense mechanism in my brain trying to keep some distance.

Thank you all so much for your prayers and intentions.  All I can think about is this beautiful little girl whose birth parents are committed to an adoption plan, and all she needs is a home, but right now – we assume she is not in any permanent place, and our hearts break for her.   Please continue to keep everyone involved in this in your hearts and minds.

One more meeting to go.  Mr. Badger and I each had our one on one meetings with S, the social worker, today.   Next Monday she’ll come to our house for the grand tour.  She said that when she comes to our house, she’ll have most of the homestudy written up.  She may email us a few times to get a name or a place or something as she finishes, but she says that it takes about 2 weeks to finish it and get approved and all that.  We’re in the home stretch!

We’ve been busy bees, getting the house in order.

The guest room is done – except for getting the closet door scoped out.  It’s two inches too narrow because of the old trim on there, so we have a contractor coming to help us and cost out our options on Friday.  But it’s all painted and has new sheets!  See my pix:

See that silly closet?  It used to have a sliding door.  We hated it, and will eventually put in some nice Elfa shelves and 2 bifold doors.

Next up, baby’s room.  It used to be the office.  We moved that downstairs, and now it’s fairly empty except for some borrowed items from my dear friend Jane.  We need to reweave the rocking chair, and put on blinds (as we need to in the guest room as well).  Did anyone else have a goosie gander light in their room growing up?  Here is mine.  Mr. Badger thinks he is creepy.  I think he is adorable.

Finally, the office in the basement.  We need to elfa the closet here, and then a lot of that crap hanging around can get put away.:

Oh, and 23 days until Grey’s.  So fucking psyched.

Yesterday we met with S, our social worker.  I. Adore. Her.

Mr. B and I were not nervous, per se, but excited? Eager?  It’s all moving, and that feels wonderful.  If I had to say any huge difference in between pursuing ART and Adoption, it would be the sense of satisfaction that comes with each step accomplished.

We sat in the office and just chatted.  She explained the process, and how she adopted both her children internationally.  It was quite soothing to hear her explain how she’s been on both sides of this dialogue, and it helps with just making it easier on everyone.

The conversation really flowed from one topic to the next.   Mostly we talked about:

• Why we were in the offices that day (ie – why adoption)
• How have we grieved fertility, and when do we anticipate future difficult times
• Our families, and how they feel about adoption
• Ourselves – how we would describe ourselves and how we would describe each other

Before we knew it, the two hours were over.  Our individual meetings are 9/2, and our final meeting at our house is on 9/8.  So about 19 days until we are paper pregnant, my friends!

She mentioned that at the home visit, she wasn’t going to be going through our drawers, and if we’re still painting rooms, that’s fine as well.  Ususally it’s just a chance for her to follow up on any questions she still had, and for getting a good feel for the house for the final write up.

We’ll need to have our original marriage license on hand, as well as the proof of the cats’ vaccines.   I am now in an allergic haze thanks to taking the cats to the vet today.  I fell asleep on the floor in my dining room.  Why there, you ask?  Because it was close.